Race 2: Slow and unsteady doesnt win this race

In the world created by Abbas Mustan, if you are a multi billionaire who wants to build a casino and are refused permission by the government, you invite an official responsible out for drinks, dance with him and then shoot him in the middle of a crowded discotheque and walk out without batting an eyelid.

In this world of "Race 2", you can get away with stealing the Shroud of Turin with something as simple as a decoy bomb and people use "sensor technology" to play card games and spy on their loved ones. It may have looked cool 20 years ago, but now it's just a tad ridiculous.

The film doesn't really take from the 2008 movie "Race", of which this is supposed to be a sequel. But to be fair to the filmmakers, there are some common characters. We see Ranvir Singh again (Saif Ali Khan), but without Sonia (Bipasha Basu). Instead, he now operates alone, seemingly helping out former street fighter-turned-billionaire Armaan Mallik (John Abraham) to make more money and protect his business from rivals.

Of course, in keeping with the Abbas-Mustan tradition, no one in the film has clear motives. So Armaan's step-sister Alina (Deepika Padukone) seems to be on her brother's side, while Armaan's girlfriend Omisha (Jacqueline Fernandez) may not be who she seems.

The story doesn't have too many twists and turns like the earlier film, and the directors do not manage to keep you on the edge of your seat. They insert crude jokes about women and fruits (Ameesha Patel, in a cringeworthy role, allows herself to be subjected to crass jokes) and coupled it with a very lacklustre plot that smacks of lazy writing.

Among the cast, Saif Ali Khan plays the suave conman well enough and Deepika Padukone looks like a billion bucks. But everyone else is stone-faced and expressionless (I am looking at you John Abraham).

This might have been a stylish film ten years ago, but the world and Bollywood has moved on. Blowing up cars and robbing banks are passe.

The most uncool part about this film, though, has to be the crude jokes that Anil Kapoor's character cracks with his assistant Cherry. At a time when we are debating whether or not Bollywood objectifies women, you don't need a bigger example than "Race 2"to see that it clearly does.

Movie Review: Talaash

The worst thing to happen while watching a murder mystery is someone telling you the twist in the tale even before the movie began. The second-worst thing is when you figure out the twist yourself, halfway through the film.

Call it a result of watching too many whodunits as a kid, but the twist in Reema Kagti's "Talaash" was apparent an hour before it ended. After that it was just a matter of waiting to see how it plays out. No surprises there either. Kagti makes a stylised film, a murder mystery that also has an emotional undercurrent and borrows strongly from well-known Hollywood films of the genre (I won't say which ones for fear of revealing the plot).

Aamir Khan plays troubled police inspector Surjan Singh Shekhawat, who moves to Mumbai after his son's death in a freak boating accident. Wracked by guilt, he roams the streets of the city that never sleeps at night, leaving his wife Roshni (Rani Mukerji) to deal with the tragedy on her own.

Shekhawat is assigned the case of Armaan Kapoor, an actor who dies after driving his car into the Arabian Sea.

It soon becomes obvious Kapoor was being blackmailed by a pimp, but it is unclear for what. When the trail leads him to a brothel, Shekhawat enlists the help of Rosy (Kareena Kapoor), a prostitute who seems to know many of the players involved in the case. Kagti sketches a motley cast of characters, including a neighbour who talks to the dead (Shernaz Patel) and a crippled pimp who wants to make a quick buck (Nawazuddin Siddiqui).

Kagti also creates the right mood, and it is this that will suck you right in. Mumbai at night is a different city, and the director uses it well to tell her story. The slums, the police stations, the roads, the flickering lights -- they add to the intrigue.

Halfway through, the magic wears off and you are left with a plot weighed down by an unnecessary emotional subplot involving Shekhawat's dead son.

Like many whodunits before, Kagti puts an "emotional core" at the heart of "Talaash", but it doesn't serve much purpose except to slow the film down. What should have been a taut thriller about a murder that doesn't seem like a murder becomes a film that isn't here nor there. The red herrings are obvious, and so are the motives, and the director has a tendency to over-state its plot points.

Kagti dwells on Shekhawat's personal tragedy far too long, with songs and flashbacks, taking away from the urgency of the mystery at hand. What is wrong with making a murder mystery just about the murder? Does it have to have an "emotional" angle?

It's a credit to Aamir Khan though that he carries off even these heavy bits flawlessly. Rani Mukerji, sans make-up and dressed rather shabbily, plays the part of the melancholy wife with restraint. Kareena Kapoor pouts, smiles and plays the mysterious girl on the street to the hilt, sometimes overdoing her act.

Despite its glitches and slow pace, "Talaash" is likely to keep you engaged for the 140 minutes you spend watching it. The trouble is, it doesn't stay with you much longer.

Zila Ghaziabad 2013

Director :  Anand Kumar
Music :  Amjad-Nadeem and Bappa Lahiri
Lyrics : Shabbir Ahmed
Starring :  Sanjay Dutt, Vivek Oberoi, Arshad Warsi, Minissha Lamba, Paresh Rawal and Ravi Kishan

There s a song, three scenes; a song three scenes; another song and three more scenes... This is Zila Ghaziabad for you. Anand Kumar has directed this balderdash of a movie.

There is a Chairman, a Fauji and a Masterji. Chairman (Paresh Rawal) is a figurehead who rules the roost in Ghaziabad along with his goons. Fauji (Arshad Warsi) is no soldier in the army. He is a thug working for Chairman. Masterji (Vivek Oberoi) is one of those educated in Ghaziabad who wants to spread the power of education. Soon, however, instead of kind words, he uses guns to settle disputes.

Then, there's also an inspector who wades through goons just on the power of his fists. He is Pritam Singh Chauhan (Sanjay Dutt). 'Deadly' was once associated with his surname. I guess it could now be 'Badly'!

To top it there are two item songs and both disappoint. About the content of the lyrics, you will have to read my column on Wednesday. How the censor is passing lines like these is still an enigma.

Amongst all this 'super crap' so-called action scenes you are treated to 'super sub-standard' acting from each and every actor on view. Everyone is out on a picnic having a ball as soon as the director calls "action". Even Ashutosh Rana appears somewhere in between to complete this mad fest.

But the dialogue of the movie is mouthed by Zarina Wahab in the end. "Beta, us rakshash ko aisa maut marna ki upar wala bhi aisa rakshash paida karne ke pehle do baar soche," she tells her son Masterji.

Now, Mr. Writer of this dialogue, don't you know that God does not create monsters but He has given us all a free will and it is us humans who decide which path to take. There is a good path and a bad path and we decide which to walk on. He is such a Gentleman that He will never influence our free will, unless we ask Him for guidance.

So this is Zila Ghaziabad. If you want to see it, do carry a strip of aspirin along. Hang on a minute, to be fair to Fauji; it is only Warsi who looks convincing in his acting.

Special 26: The heist that almost worked

Bollywood hasn’t had an impressive track record with thrillers. Most have been slow and predictable while some were downright preposterous.

Director Neeraj Pandey‘s “A Wednesday“, a film about an ordinary Mumbai citizen who plots to kill terror masterminds, was a breath of fresh air in 2008. It was imaginative, taut and full of twists and turns.

But Pandey’s new film “Special 26?, a heist drama, does not quite hit the bull’s eye — with an insipid love story and a forgettable “item number” playing spoilsport.

It does have a good plot to begin with. Inspired from a real-life jewellery heist in 1987, the film is about a gang of con artists who masquerade as law enforcement officers to rob politicians and businessmen of their “black money” or undeclared wealth.

As leaders of the gang, Akshay Kumar and Anupam Kher play their roles to the hilt. In films such as “Rowdy Rathore” and “Khiladi 786”, Kumar relied on brawn or slapstick to impress audiences but here he gets to show off his acting skills, while Kher is at his charming and versatile best.

The director’s attention to detail is commendable. Among the elements that work wonderfully to depict the 1980s on screen — a Connaught Place dotted with hmt and Only Vimal stores, an electric blender that baffles Kher’s character with its mere existence, and Maruti hatchbacks zooming through Delhi and Mumbai streets.

“Special 26? does not rely on crude jokes or slapstick comedy and sticks to subtle humour. The show stealer is Manoj Bajpayee who plays the CBI officer chasing the impersonators. It’s hard to take your eyes off Bajpayee in his turn as a ruthless investigator with deadpan delivery.

But the highly dispensable romance between Kumar’s character and Priya (Kajal Aggarwal in an ornamental role) defuses the tension and slows the film to an unforgivable pace — a cardinal sin in any heist drama.

Pandey was bold enough to make “A Wednesday” without a 20-something woman as eye candy, but he disappoints the second time around.

““Special 26? is not a bad film. It keeps the audience engaged. Sadly, it could have been much better.

Murder 3: Doesnt go in for the kill

The latest addition to the “Murder” franchise is a lot of things, but one thing it isn’t is true to its name. Don’t expect a lot of shooting and slashing.

“Murder 3” is a Bhatt franchise, so the title hardly matters. All movies associated with them have pretty much the same structure and tone, a little bit of skin show, some nasal, high-pitch songs and the mystery element that forms the major chunk of the film.

Debutant director Vishesh Bhatt makes an “official” remake of the Colombian film “The Hidden Face” and doesn’t veer from the original story line at all.

Randeep Hooda plays Vikram, a photographer who shoots everything from calendars to wildlife (one of the opening shots shows Hooda shooting ostriches and zebras grazing peacefully near leopards in a meadow).

He moves to India with his architect girlfriend Roshni (Aditi Rao Hydari) on a lucrative contract and the two move in to a palatial house.

Their domestic bliss is interrupted when Roshni disappears, and the police suspect Vikram of having something to do with it, but find no conclusive proof. Meanwhile, tired of pining after his girlfriend, Vikram takes to drinking and falls in love with a waitress (Sara Loren).

She soon moves in with him, but is spooked by the strange happenings in the house. There are voices coming out of a tap, water draining out mysteriously and of course, the staple of horror film-makers – lights going off.

The first half is sluggish, but the pace picks up immediately in the second half, when the twist is revealed. Bhatt manages to create a few thrilling moments, but they are momentary and the film never quite completely manages to engage you.

A large part of this can be attributed to lazy scripting and directing, and the acting never seems to convey the desperation and emotions the characters should be going through.

Songs interrupt a few crucial scenes and Bhatt doesn’t quite manage to wrap it all up together in the end. The end is meant to be mysterious, but instead, seems hurried.

This is a harmless film, one that is neither good nor bad. It might have been better if the director had managed to bring in a potent psychological angle to it, but that never happens.

I, Me aur Main: Let down by inconsistencies

I have to confess I didn’t go into Kapil Sharma’s “I, Me aur Main” with too many expectations. The posters certainly did nothing to pique my excitement. But 30 minutes into the film, I was intrigued. This wasn’t a run-of-the-mill story; the protagonist was someone you would want to hit on the head within the first half-hour.

John Abraham plays that protagonist — Ishaan Sabharwal, a prototype of the (dare I say it) typical Indian make — pampered and protected by the women in his life and made to believe he can never put a foot wrong. Ishaan lives off his rich girlfriend Anushka (Chitrangada Singh), going so far as to refuse to pay the milk bill since he doesn’t drink it.

Anushka tolerates his self-centred ways but decides enough is enough and cuts off all ties when he stops short of committing to her. Stranded, Ishaan moves into another house, blaming Anushka for his plight and wallowing in self-pity.

But his friendship with chirpy neighbour Gauri (Prachi Desai) changes his perspective, and he realizes he isn’t necessarily the centre of the universe.

Sharma’s film has the germ of a great idea and scriptwriter Devika Bhagat certainly seems to have set out to make the modern Indian rom-com. In parts, the film even gets there. Some scenes, like the one between Ishaan and his mother, where she talks about her relationships and the one at the end with Ishaan and Anushka are refreshingly original.

But like an errant driver, Sharma seems to veer off the track too often, lending an uneven feel to the whole film. Ishaan’s transformation is sudden and his change of heart feels rushed.

Prachi Desai’s character is too shrill, in contrast to Chitrangada Singh, who plays the role of the hurt but mature woman to the hilt. John Abraham is commendable in his role as Ishaan, bringing sensitivity to the role of the man-child who doesn’t want to grow up.

“I, Me Aur Main” is let down by inconsistencies in its tone and direction but it might still be worth your while if you don’t go in with too many expectations.